Fozzil and Nadhirah created this page to share the uniqueness of a traditional Malay wedding as well as the particular traditions that we choose to follow.
The Malay community hold steadfast to their customs and traditions and an emphasis is usually placed on marital customs. What makes it unique is that a Malay wedding comes in several parts.
Merisik
Traditionally in times where dating was a taboo, the groom's family will approach the bride's family to ensure the lady in question is not spoken for.
Despite being in modern times, we decided to uphold this tradition. Thus, Fozz's family (a team of 16) made the drive from Singapore to Ipoh during the Christmas break 2009 (24 Dec 2009 - 26 Dec 2009) to ask for Nadhirah's hand in marriage from her parents. Due to the distance, we combined the merisik and meminang (confirmation of marriage as well as agreeing on which traditions to follow) ceremonies into a simple relaxed night of discussion rather than a formal scripted ceremony which usually follows with an exchanging of gifts.
Picture was taken after discussions were over. The ring signifies the bride is spoken for and was placed on the bride's finger by the groom's mother. Flanking the bride and the groom are the bride's parents.
Last day in Ipoh
Bertunang (Engagement)
Next would be a traditional engagement ceremony with another set of gift exchanges, however due to the distances between Singapore, Ipoh AND Perth, we decided to skip this ceremony. By traditional standards, we're not engaged.
Akad Nikah (Solemnisation)
This is the most important process applicable to ALL Muslims as this affirms the validity of the marriage in the eyes of Allah.
The ceremony is conducted by a kadi (religious celebrant) and the bride will be given away by her father and this has to be witnessed by two men. An exchanging of rings and gifts will happen during the akad nikah. Ceremony is usually small scale and attended by a select group of friends and family, often held by the bride's family.
Bersanding (Ceremony)
A huge gala is then held to be attended by relatives, neighbours and friends. Arriving in style, flanked by friends and relatives, the bride and groom will be treated like royals for the day. Various royal customs will be performed for them including court musicians, bodyguards performing martial arts and sitting on a throne (wedding dais).
A unique quirk of the Malay customs is that instead of holding one large reception, the bride’s and groom’s reception are held in two large ceremonies, thus, if you are friends to both of us, please do not be surprised if you receive invitations for two wedding receptions. But don't worry, you won't be seeing the same thing twice, as the bride having Arabic heritage will infuse some Arabic traditions into the reception, and the groom being part Pakistani, will infuse heavy doses of Pakistani flavour into his ceremonies.
The two important dates are:
Bride’s Reception : 01.01.2011
Groom’s Reception : 09.01.2011
Groom’s Reception : 09.01.2011
We apologise but we would like to keep the wedding details private.
All guests will receive a formal invitation closer to the date of the wedding.
For the invitees please RSVP accordingly to the invitations.
If you're interested to learn more on the Malay wedding traditions, feel free to ask us ANY questions!
